7 Ways to Help Your Child Navigate Anxiety About School
Returning to school can evoke a mix of emotions in children. While some eagerly anticipate new adventures, others may face anxiety and uncertainty. Children often worry about academic pressures or their social dynamics. They might be anxious about making friends, meeting new teachers, or even adjusting to different subjects. My experience as a child therapist has taught me that adopting a compassionate and empathetic approach can make a world of difference.
Practical Techniques to Reduce School Anxiety at Home
Here are some tips to help your child overcome anxiety while at school.
Help Them Verbalize Their Worries
Encourage your child to share their feelings about school. Ask, 'What part of school worries you?' or 'Can you describe a time at school that wasn't fun?' Show you're engaged by nodding, maintaining eye contact, and responding empathetically. Sometimes, children just need to feel heard. Then calmly reflect on what you heard, like, 'I understand you're worried about making new friends,' to validate their feelings.
Create a Worry Journal
Creating a worry journal is a simple yet powerful tool to help your child manage school-related anxiety. Encourage them to jot down their concerns each time they feel anxious about school. This allows their brain to process worries differently and reduce overthinking. By regularly recording their thoughts, your child can begin to identify patterns in their anxiety and view their concerns within the context of their broader life.
Educate Your Child About Anxiety
Help them grasp what a thought really is. For younger children, explain that just because an idea pops into their mind doesn't mean it's destined to happen. For older kids, delve a bit deeper and explain that it consists of three interlinked components:
Thoughts: These are the fearful ideas about school.
Physical Sensations: These might include a racing heart or feeling queasy.
Actions: Often, these thoughts and sensations lead to avoiding situations that trigger fear.
Helping them see this cycle can empower them to break it, improving their resilience and understanding.
Guide Your Child to Challenge Their Worries
Encourage them to use rational thinking by asking them to "take their thought to court." Have them write down evidence for why their fear might come true alongside evidence for why it might not. This exercise helps them assess their anxieties with a balanced perspective, often revealing that their fears may be exaggerated. While you're encouraging them to think critically and rationally, be careful not to dismiss or trivialize their feelings.
Teach Them Relaxation Techniques
Encourage your child to take some deep breaths, inhaling through their nose, holding it, and then exhaling slowly through their mouth. Let them do this for a few minutes to calm down. They can also try progressive muscle relaxation. Tense up their muscles from their toes to their head, then relax them one by one. This releases tension.
Use a Reward System
Say, if attending school consistently is their goal, agree on a reward in advance. Perhaps extra screen time or a small treat. This incentive can motivate them to persevere through their anxious moments. Set the reward before the school day begins and give it immediately after school. This immediate reinforcement strengthens the positive behavior, helping your child associate school with positive outcomes. And don't worry, you won't need to do this forever. As their confidence builds, you can phase out rewards over time.
Guide Your Child in Breaking Down Their Anxiety
Start by helping your child identify specific fears, like speaking in class or wearing their uniform. Breaking these fears into manageable steps is key. Begin with slightly challenging tasks, gradually working up to the most dreaded. For example, if your child is nervous about a new school, a walk around the building or browsing the website together can help. Slowly facing these fears builds confidence and resilience.
Child therapy can be a lifeline for both you and your child when navigating school-related anxiety. Our large team specializes in working with children, teens, and even couples, ensuring holistic support for the entire family. We celebrate diversity and inclusivity, ensuring every family feels welcome. With our telehealth services, no matter your schedule, help is just a click away. Contact our office today to schedule your first appointment.
